Back in the good ol' days when a man could sit in the sun and warm his butt in the steam of a fresh cup of coffee

It was a bit of a rough trip to the doctors office today. After a raft of tests over the last few weeks the doctors assistants have been calling to demand I make an appointment and see him so I have. My kidneys are giving off significant amounts of protein and are in a state of moving towards collapse. The doctor has put me on Tryzan which is a generic angiotensin containing ramipril. They are normally given for high blood pressure, to protect the heart after a heart attack (I will get to that) and in the case of severe kidney damage. The side effects seem to be pretty nasty and the list of dangerous things that can happen to those allergic is a bit nasty as well. I have some of the conditions a person should not have when taking the medication so this prescription may be a bit of a desperate measure. In the light of all the other things I am sure it is.

Two days back, on the 15th Nov, I went and had an echo cardiogram. That is a bit like those things pregnant women get when they get to see their babies actually moving in the womb. This was on my heart though. I watched over the technician’s shoulder as she worked the device across and around my chest looking all over my heart for damage. The normal time taken for this exam was twenty minutes but we got through it in ten minutes. I could see why. The heart was not a big clean pump pulsing in my chest. It looked as though all of the inside walls and valves had been chewed and long fronds of flesh waved in the pulsing blood like kelp fields in the waters of the ocean. It was fascinating and I badly want a copy of that bit of vision. It is also deadly and the image is of a heart grievously wounded. All those years I begged for help and those doctors called me a drug seeker they were doing that to my body. The appointment for the cardiologist is in a few weeks but my doctor has forewarned me the direction of this appointment even if not the final diagnosis.

There have been severe symptoms of other problems and I have been suffering things that were unexpected in the light of present medical conditions. One in particular over the last few months has been atrocious hyper-sensitivity to weather changes and resultant joint pain. This year the weather has been a mad hatter’s party of changes as often as three times a day and across a really amazing range of conditions. The joint pain with each change has seen me almost suicidal. There has been abdominal pain, lots of it. Insomnia for years! Kidney damage is a feature as well, oh my god! Possibly even the battle with my heart has been accelerated by the heavy metal poisoning from that tap and perhaps the many other old taps in all the cheap rentals I have been living in for ever. There was also the continuing loss of mental acuity and I have been fighting a massive battle to visualize drawings and then to actually work them. The weakness is reasonable with some of the known illnesses but altogether it has been a killing few months. I clicked onto a possibility when the community helper complained that I must be putting some other liquid into the dish washing fluid as it would not foam up.

The house is over sixty years old. The plumbing is cheap and may not even have met standards at the time it was made as this place was a backwater with no one to examine buildings. I have been largely house bound here for the last seven years and have taken almost all of my liquid intake from one tap in the kitchen. The water was rarely run for any more than seconds as we had been in drought for most of that time. Lead poisoning! The symptoms fit! I stopped using the tap for drinking water and the hyper-sensitivity went almost immediately. The fog I had been swimming through mentally considerably cleared. I looked up the effects of lead poisoning and just to add to the burdens of the last few weeks any brain damage from this condition may be permanent and I have really lost some power in the old processing unit. My experience with brain damage suggests that the diagnosis of no improvement is incorrect in the long term. Recent medical research shows brains do heal but look at all the other shit going on. Diabetes, liver damage, kidney collapse, a damaged heart and all sorts of painful disabilities and even some spinal damage with cracked and crushed disks. It is not like there is a chance for me to create a healthy stress-free environment for myself. Life really fucking hurts these days! My doctor had some trouble meeting my eye this time around. We are kinda friends and that has never happened before.

I started buying bottled water and went through about twenty liters a week including those really hot days which went up to 37C. At .99bucks a liter that is a fair bit of extra weight on the disability pension. Looking at the water filters in Coles Supermarket suggested they filter lead and other heavy metals but I have had such bad results with a lot of Coles products I decided to wait until I  could look elsewhere. On the way back from the doctors appointment the community worker who helps me about and cleans etc had a huge water filter and jug in the back of the car. She claimed to have broken the filter section but would give it to me if I thought I could use it. The damned thing is immense. A nine liter stoneware pottery water cooler and filter from Southern Cross Pottery. I did the research to assure myself and ordered their six month filter at about $30 delivered in the mail. I was not going to keep the thing if it did not filter heavy metals and to be honest I hate being given things. It gives people the right to expect gratitude and makes you beholden apart from being patronizing. This time however I have taken it. The object costs over two hundred buck new and will filter a thousand liters per six month filter. You can see the saving. Anyway I have debriefed and vented all in one page so almost time to get outta here. Hmm. I do not want to tell mum of the increase in my health problems.

I am trying to get the correct approach to a few other treatments for lead poisoning as the material is not gone just because I have stopped ingesting it. Chelation is the main treatment and there even seems to be some DIY methods I can look at. did I mention my sleep patterns have changed to the point where I would not use the term insomniac at all. Insomnia has been a major feature of my life for the last few years! Anyway I am wandering back and forth in my ideas and must be tired. You can imagine what all this has done emotionally.