Not the after-death and floating in light things but what does my family do? After the initial rush of relief that is.
This journal digs right deep into my guts so people who want to want to know what it is like to be crippled and survive in a society like Australia can find something that may give them an idea. It is unfortunate that I am also a screwed up and emotionally broken human but I have to think that being this frank about the situations I end up in will help somebody. It is not normal to speak of life this frankly in a blog and it is not normal to have a road map to the fragility of another human at your finger tips. What I am trying to say, perhaps, is that when a person looking for answers about life as a vulnerable person reads a report with a packet of statistical data and fully charted studies they are as far from any real answers or even real questions as they can be. I am arrogant enough to think my journal adds a layer of reality to that and the wholesale soul baring is not just an embarrassing waste of text.
What happens when I die?
Pencil drawing with digital imaging (by me)
I looked into that over the last few days. I wanted to know what to tell my family to expect if the decline in my health became so dangerous I had to end my life. My brother committed suicide and it ruined us a functioning humans for some time after that. If we had known what we needed to know we might have had less pain and felt less hopelessness. Not a lot less but anything is gold when the world seems so harsh. This stuff is a couple of simple facts from the people who sustain me about what my family can expect afterwards. It might help you decide how to help your family if you or a relative/loved one face a terminal illness while living in government housing and in care. It is very simple.
Housing New South Wales: A phone call to these guys was answered by Jess who was really good. The properties we rent are normally paid for two weeks in advance. The housing department does not come until the keys are handed in and I guess if there is money in the bank they may have more than two weeks to get things organized. I got the sense that in all but a few cases if you need more time it can be arranged.
Aged Disability Support Services: I had a furious email exchange with Tony who is worth his weight in gold to his clients. I believe ( and there are a few bugs in my memory) That ADSSI will link in with the surviving next of kin or loved one to assist them to get the place cleared and carry out any simple and non-complex requests for bequests. He insisted I have a Will. They can be downloaded online. I think you can get them at newsagents and the carers have ways to get them signed off by the proper official. I just have a few notes attached to my insurance policy. I don’t own much. Simple and very reassuring!
For my part I suggest a funeral insurance policy. This is a mention from a personal experience and not initiated by any company. Mum recently lost a beloved friend to age and illness. After we lost my brother we suffered so badly because of costs and things that we looked about for something to ensure we would not add that burden on each other. Mum really struggled. The advertisements for Real Insurance’s funeral insurance were running so we both grabbed a policy as did Bryan. On Bryan s death the policy was paid out in full and quite quickly which gave Mum some power in the events and much relief. The only warning is to be careful to keep the payments up or you lose it. I have had that happen but started another policy as I want Mum to be free of that burden at least. I know many cannot afford insurance or cannot organize it. Fine. We do what we can.
The process I have been through is also an indication of my requests for treatment should I be helpless after illness or accident. It has told everybody how I feel about being a functional vegetable or in the grip of another long fight for life. At some point this stuff become unable to be avoided and although it hurts them to face it now they will be less damaged if anything happens
The answer I have not managed to get is the one from Centrelink. They just have too many filters on their phones and internet right now. Have I made this too simple? I hope I covered enough to give someone the tools they need to make the loss of a loved one a bit more manageable. I still have to write up the cardio. It went much better than the visit to emergency with such awesome staff looking after my heart. Just so they know I noticed!
The image above was meant to be a skull with the light of knowledge in the form of a candle bursting out of the top. I accidentally cut the flame off and now it is the death of a dickhead. Entirely appropriate!